Well, since I’ve moved out to Nashville it’s been kind of hard for me to make friends of my own considering the restrictions going on in our current way of living.
The beau needs to keep the relationship kinda low-key because of his family and job. Being in the job-type he is, they don’t have the kind of protections you and I might enjoy with anti-discrimination clauses and stuff. So that means when I’m around his fellow workers and coworker/friends, I need to stay closeted for the most part. Which isn’t that big of a deal. I definitely understand.
Alot of our time is also spent in church and he’s spent most of his life attending regular churches. His parents are very strict-type Christians as well meaning having to keep our relationship under wraps there as well because he just doesn’t feel at all like they would understand.
So to sum it all up, it’s really hard for me to make friendships out here solely because I can’t be honest with anyone. And to be brutally honest, the beau’s friends are just way different from me in every way…not a good match. In fact, I think the beau is starting to see what kind of folks they really are…but I digress lol.
Just to give it a try, I’ve been looking around some of the apps like Grindr and DList and casually checking in once in a while to scout for folks who are looking for friendships as well. When the beau is out of town for work, it gets quite boring for me.
Anyways, I was talking to this one guy back and forth for a few days, just to make sure he wasn’t a weirdo or secretly waiting to strip off the sheep’s clothing to reveal the sex fiend that they really were. During these few days it was very cordial banter, and we found that we share a number of geeky interests which I find really cool.
So we chatted yesterday and he ended up coming over to hang out last night. We played some Band Hero and chatted for the most part and boy it felt good to finally have someone I could let my guard down with and just talk. I didn’t have to dissect my thoughts before I said them to make sure I didn’t sneak anything in that might sound the least bit gay. And I could actually open up and feel like I was being heard. Stepping into my beau’s world and circle of friends, I often feel like a bit player and hidden in the background since he’s the center of their attention.
He’s kinda cute, but also (thankfully) not really my type and so I definitely feel like I can be totally free from any sort of temptations when hanging out with him. That was one of my main worries going into trying to find other gay friends in this new area. Finding ones who truly and really want to just be friends. And I think I may have lucked out and found one. Cross your fingers for me!
What i need is a fag hag finder…anyone got a site for that?
It’s so much easier when the friends are female as long as they know that you’re gay ahead of time.
I totally agree with that! As low maintainance as possible is a hope. 😛